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1. You know the meaning of the word 'girt'.

2. You know that stubbies can be either drunk or worn.

3. You think it's normal to have a leader called Kevin.

4. You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount vouchers stuffed in your wallet or purse.

5. You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden.

6. You believe it is appropriate to put a rubber in your son's pencil case when he first attends school.

7. When you hear that an American 'roots for his team' you hope he's wearing a condom.

8. You understand that the phrase 'a group of women wearing black thongs' is a LOT less alluring than it sounds.

9. You pronounce Melbourne as 'Mel-bin'.

10. You pronounce Penrith as 'Pen-riff'.

11. You believe the 'l' in the word 'Australia' is optional and can be replaced with a 'y'.

12. You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas; and Dazza is a complete slacka, and Shazza is a bit of a tossa.'

13. You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep.

14. You call your best friend 'a total bastard' but someone you really, truly despise is just 'a bit of a bastard'.

15. You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a place, and you can spell it.

16. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife, and think we should take the tourist warning signs down.

17. You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin.

18. You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'.

19. You passionately believe that cooked-down dregs out of a beer barrel makes a good breakfast spread.

20. You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis. Case in Point: Sam Neill!

21. Hamburger. Beetroot. Of course.

22. You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again. And that it's a long way to the shop if you want a sausage roll.

23. You believe, as an article of faith, that the confectionary known as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year.

24. You still don't get why the 'Labor' in 'Australian Labor Party' is not spelt with a 'u'.

25. You wear ugh boots outside the house.

26. You believe, as an article of faith, that every important discovery in the world was made by an Australian but then sold off to foreign influences for a pittance.

27. You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them.

28. Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language.

29. You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, while 'scuse me' is always polite.

30. You know what it's like to swallow/inhale a fly, on occasion via your nose.

31. You understand that 'you' has a plural and that it's 'youse'.

32. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle.

33. Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules for (beach cricket) monopoly.

34. You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies'.

35. You still think of Kylie as 'that bimbo off Neighbours'.

36. When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally strip-searched by Customs - just in case you're trying to sneak in fruit.

37. You believe the phrase 'smart casual' refers to a pair of black tracky-daks, suitably laundered.

38. You understand that all train timetables are works of fiction.

39. When working on a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer.

40. You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national anthem and then have trouble remembering the second.

41. You find yourself ignorant of nearly all the facts deemed essential in the government's new test for migrants.

42. You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says 'cobber' and we have NEVER thrown a shrimp on the barbie.

43. And you will immediately forward this list to other Australians, here and overseas, realising that only they will understand.

Scary thing is, I was nodding at most of these (except the anthem. I know both verses of that)

Date: 2008-03-06 11:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bronzetigress.livejournal.com
19. You passionately believe that cooked-down dregs out of a beer barrel makes a good breakfast spread.

Oh, is that what it's made from? *curious face* Makes sense, I suppose. ;)

Date: 2008-03-06 11:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] masi-tfoot.livejournal.com
Well, the main ingredient is yeast. *grins*. I love the stuff in small doses.

Date: 2008-03-07 12:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bronzetigress.livejournal.com
*nodnod* Knew that, just wasn't sure where they got it from! ;)
I feel like I'm otherwise way out of touch with an awful lot of the "local" slang up there, though!

[Then again, I'm apparently not up to date with local slang for Canada, either, so... *shrugs* :) ]

Date: 2008-03-07 10:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nurdhegilwen.livejournal.com
*LOL* there is something like that for Swiss People as well (hm... need to find it....) - and I found myself nodding to most of it as well.... ;) *ggg*

Date: 2008-03-07 11:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] masi-tfoot.livejournal.com
Read your Swiss one... it's just as strange as mine!

Date: 2008-03-08 11:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nurdhegilwen.livejournal.com
hehe, yeah, but they're fun, no? ;)

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